(Article as featured in A Lust For Life)
Your body is supposed to be your friend but for many of us we are at war the with our body and our life is the battle field.
Do you feel consumed by anger, desperation and shame because your body doesn’t look a certain way? I know how it feels! It can turn into quite the obsession trying to fix what we think is broken, to turn our body into something that will only then be worthy of love.
In today’s society we have been taught that the most attractive feature of a person’s humanity is their appearance and the most desirable assets are youthful looking skin, a flat stomach, perky bum or long, toned legs.
To top it all off we have been led to believe that it is acceptable to do whatever it takes to get there. Our attitudes to our body is that it is only a prop to express beauty – to be made look pretty, skinny or lean.
We are bombarded with campaigns that imply that are bodies are not good enough. No matter what the type – skinny, lean, fat or athletic – there is an unrelenting force telling us that our body is wrong.
Many of us allow these disempowering campaigns to penetrate, distort and manipulate the beliefs we hold about our own bodies, and as a result value, worth and identity.
But your body is the companion that will empower you to truly understand and connect with your health, strength, vitality and agility. Your body is a powerful presence in this world, and it wasn’t put on this world to look a certain way or fit whatever the current cultural mode of ‘perfection’ is!
All bodies are worthy of love! Here are 5 ways you can start your journey today.
- To love your body does not mean you have to love ALL of your body. It’s an unrealistic standard to tell ourselves that we absolutely have to love every part of our body — or else. We can love parts of our bodies and not the whole thing and that is fine! Loving your body is a continuous journey and not an uphill battle to fall in love with every atom of your being. As long as you focus more time and energy loving the parts of your body that you love instead of hating the parts you hate, you will be just fine.
Focus more time and energy loving the parts of your body that you love
2. Fall in love with what your body CAN do! Your body is designed to do some incredible things – squat, bench, kart wheel, skip, cycle, run, play, dance! Explore what your body can do and fall in love with movement.
Fall in love with movement
3. Your appearance does not define your worth or value, period! Your self-esteem is not bound to an outside thing, your sparkle is already inside of you. If there is an imbalance in your life – if you spend more time thinking about the gym, exercise, your body or food – then shift your energy towards something else. Your body is not your identity but it is easy to get wrapped up with your reflection when you spend so much time thinking about it. Life is a BIG picture, don’t ever forget that! When you are on your deathbed, do you want to be remembered as the girl who could list her top 5 diet tips at the drop of a hat?
Your feminine beauty is already inside of you
4. Fall in love with your body, not someone else’s. Comparison is the thief of beauty, happiness and success – yet we all do it. If you are serious about developing and growing in confidence and self esteem than you must focus on your personal strengths, uniqueness and successes.
Comparison is the thief of beauty
5. Stop beating yourself up because you don’t look a certain way! If you saw your child talk to herself the way you sometimes do, your heart would break! Your negative self talk is not going to make your thighs any smaller or your tummy any flatter and it certainly won’t make you feel any happier. Treat yourself with love and kindness and you will begin a journey of self-acceptance and self love.
Treat yourself with love and kindness
Your body is your friend and your companion. It is okay to love your body. It doesn’t make you full of yourself, vain, conceited, cocky or self absorbed. You can, and should, acknowledge your beauty and love your body with kindness and compassion and in turn inspire others to feel they can as well.
How do you feel right now? A little better? That’s good – that’s a thing called hope. Maybe you didn’t realise it before, or you’d forgotten – but things can and will be better. You just need be reminded.
You don’t just need one reminder though. You need daily reminders until its so hardwired into your brain that you don’t even think about it anymore. This takes action!
It’s not about dieting, even though I’m a certified personal trainer. You need to love your body and shift your energy away from the non-stop stress of calorie counting, punishment cardio, suffering and misery.
It’ll take about 21 days to get there - 21 daily reminders. But from day 1 you’ll feel amazing.
You have hope – and that lifts the weight off your shoulders.
This is the only way out of hating your body, binging, purging and relying on how you look to tell you how to feel.
Genuinely, it hurts to see beautiful women, loving friends, mothers and family members put up with that kind of misery every day. You’d think that if you’re successful in work, or in sport, or even just in having great relationships with friends you could overcome something like this. But you can’t. It’s a deeper emotional response that clicking your fingers or pushing to the back of your mind won’t resolve.
Even when you think you’re over it, you’re not – ever experience that time you’re in new clothes, feeling pretty good about yourself only to see a colleague or random girl dressed the same, only wearing it better? Then the self doubt starts. The confidence you had is gone. You’re back to second guessing yourself.
…that’s because it was never really there in the first place – it was a façade. You can’t paper over the cracks. You need to knock the house down and rebuild it.
It’s a simple process. Not easy, but simple. Knowing where to start is the hardest part. There’s 3 steps you can take every day to shoring up your foundations.
I’ve put it together into easy to consume 20 minute daily sessions in an online programme called My Body Beautiful.
If you’ve heard of life coaching, but never knew what it was – now you do .That’s all there is to it. And like eating out, you can do for a donkey kebab, or a fillet steak.
The clients I work with are normal folks, living a “normal” life working in a wide variety of industries from retail to corporate to unemployed. The programmes they join normally require a monthly investment of €300. Some will even upgrade to my VIP Lifestyle Design package which is €1,500. The common factor linking them all together though is that they invest in themselves and put a high priority on their own happiness.
I know the investment there seems high. And when you don’t know what you’re getting, or if you’ll be successful, it’s hard to justify. That’s why I’m giving you a test drive today.
I told you it will take 21 daily reminders to start shifting into love yourself mode, so I took the thing I use with most clients in every session, and put it together into an easy to consume package for you – for the next 21 days we’re going to re-programme your beliefs. It takes just 20 minutes a day.
So you can spend €1,500 on my 3 month lifestyle design overhaul program, and spend the first month of that working on your belief systems. Or you can join My Body Beautiful and do the same.
- To get you started, we’ll even do a Skype consultation for 30-60 minutes so I can walk you through the programme and make sure you understand everything before you get started. I do it over Skype because it means no matter where you are, you can get started. I’ve clients in every corner of Ireland, and the UK – even though I'm in Dublin. My programmes are particularly popular in London. Normally, it costs €90 to do a private Skype consultation with me, but as part of this programme you get it for free.
- Then you’ll get added into the My Body Beautiful Facebook group where you’ll get to share you experience and light bulb moments with the other girls taking part.
- Every day for the next 21 days you’ll receive an email from me first thing with your daily affirmation, a task to do, and something to be mindful of each day.
My Body Beautiful is just €47 for 21 days. About the same price as a bottle of water and a chocolate bar each day.
There’s obviously a full money back guarantee. If you regret joining up in a few days, or weeks, just tell me. I’ll immediately refund the €47 and replenish your water and chocolate fund! You don’t even have to tell me why it wasn’t for you – just let me know its not working out and I’ll refund you immediately.
You DO have this in you. I know its scary. But no one else is stopping you. This is a landmark moment. You are the only person stopping yourself from making a change.
You want to make it. You NEED to make it. Today is the day to take action on it.